Friday, September 08, 2006

Time Flies, Part 1

A month before I had Karate Kid, the doctor told me that she thought he was breach. We trotted down to the ultrasound room to have a gander. During the ultrasound she asked if we wanted to know the sex. As soon as we told her no, she said, "Well, I better move away from between the legs then because it's very apparent." I was ticked off that she even said that because I knew right then that he was a boy. I probably could have talked myself into thinking that I could have misunderstood her meaning, in the hopes that we could still be surprised, until a few minutes later she said, "We can try to turn him--turn the baby." We went out that night and started buying boys' clothes.

Twelve years ago today I woke up in the wee hours of the morning, showered, did my hair and makeup, and left for the hospital. Since he was still breach and he was my first baby, the doctor wouldn't let me try to have him au naturel. I was scheduled for a c-section two weeks before my due date. You wanna talk about one scared girl! Lordy, I was so nervous I was shaking all over. I can't remember if I babbled all the way to the hospital or if I didn't say a word. Knowing me, I babbled incessantly.

My parents' next-door neighbor (a family friend) was a nurse at the hospital I was going to, so she told me that she would adjust her schedule so she could be with me. I thought it was a great idea--until later. The first thing she did was hook me up to a fetal monitor. She tried and tried to find a hearbeat but couldn't get one. I was starting to worry, but when she asked me if I had felt any movement that morning, I freaked. She tried again and again before asking me where the doctor usually found it. She gave up and told me she'd be back in a minute. I was panicked by then! The wait for her to get back seemed to take forever. She brought a new monitor in and found the heartbeat the very first try. Apparently the first one was defective.

Next came the I.V. Definitely not fun, but bearable. However when I realized that my neighbor was the one that was going to shave me and insert a catheter? Any semblance of fun was gone. We ended up knowing each other in a much more intimate way after that day!

Down to the operating room we went. Time for the epidural. Wonderful things, those epies. BUT when they threaded mine in and said I would feel a little tingling, they forgot to warn me that if they hit a nerve it would feel like I had been struck by lightning. That was absolutely the worst part of the whole birth experience.

By the time it was actually too late to change doctors, I realized that I hated my doctor. With a passion. I quit asking her questions during our office visits because she would treat me like I was wasting her time or I was an idiot. She didn't have any children at the time, but I did a little dance when I found out a couple of years later that she was pregnant with twins. I hope it hurt. Just kidding. Kind of Anyway, I was not looking forward to having her do the procedure, but their office policy was that her partner would assist in all c-sections. He was the exact opposite of her--caring, warm and nice. For some reason, medication or nerves or both, my whole body started shaking. Everybody kept asking me if I was cold, but I wasn't. Dr. Nice got me a couple of heated blankets and covered me up and then held my feet to warm them up.

The last thing they did was strap my arms out to my sides on some armrests. Not a good thing for someone who is claustrophobic. They wouldn't let me wear my contacts, so I had my glasses on. Once they put the oxygen mask on me, my glasses fogged up and I couldn't see anything. That's when I started to panic. I felt like I couldn't catch my breath because of the stupid oxygen, like I was trying to look through a sauna room, and I was scared to death that they would start before I was completely numb. Thankfully this was about the time they brought The Hubster in.

Warning: A couple of things may be a tiny bit graphic. Squeamish people, read at your own risk.

Having The Hubster there really helped calm me down. He pulled my glasses away from my face a little bit and held my hand. I was still freaking out about them starting too soon, though. My doctor asked me if I was okay, and when I answered yes, she told me that they had made the first incision. I hadn't felt a thing. I didn't know whether to throw up, cry, or what.

Then the sounds reached my ears. Oh, my freakin' gosh! I thought I was going to come undone. I was begging The Hubster to talk to me, to say anything at all so I didn't have to hear what they were doing. I have no idea what he talked about, but it did the trick. Before too long, my sweet baby boy was born. I could barely see him. My glasses had fallen back down and I was crying, so I was pretty blind again at that point. Plus they held him next to my head kind of upside down, so I didn't get much of a view. All I wanted to do was hold my precious baby, but they had my arms tied to those stinkin' boards. Before I had much time to react, they took him away.

The Hubster went to watch them weigh and measure him and then came back. Now he is not good with blood, so he was very thankful that they had a drape so he didn't have to see anything. As he was sitting with me, my doctor called his name and said, "You want to know why he was breach and couldn't turn?" When she called his name, The Hubster instinctively turned to her. What he didn't know was that she was holding my uterus (was too far out of my body, if you ask me!) and he got a full view of it. She explained that I had a septum (a line) that ran down the center, making it heart shaped. Once Karate Kid got big enough to turn head down, that septum made it impossible for him to do so.

Nice going, doc. I had no idea what had happened, but The Hubster sat back down with a really weird look on his face. Well, on what I could see of his face above the mask. I asked him if he was okay, and he told he was find, just a little hot. His eyes began to glaze over, so I asked him again. The anesthesiologist heard him that time and asked if was okay. When The Hubster said he was fine, just hot, nurses came running from everywhere. They yanked him out of the operating room, took his mask off, gave him orange juice, and made him lie down on a bench in the hallway. Once he was feeling somewhat better, he went to the waiting room to give everyone the news. He must not have been completely over the ordeal because when they asked him what it was, he informed them it was a baby and then turned around and walked off.

To Be Continued...

Posted @ 12:27 PM ~ 2 comments

Post a Comment